“Abbye Did It” And Other Things I Say To My Wife

It’s Monday, we could all use a laugh.
So I have compiled for you a list of things I have said to my wife in the past month……

“Which way do I turn here?
I know this goes completely against the “Guy Code,” but I have no sense of direction. My wife is the navigator. I could get lost pulling out of the driveway.

“It’s all part of the experience, Honey”
A quote from Clark W. Grizwald Jr. that I have adopted as my response to questions, complaints or criticism.

“Abbye did it.”
My go-to response when I am asked things like, “Who left the milk out?” “Why is the toilet seat up?” and “Who ate all the cookies?” My 17 month-old is a great fall girl.

“Does this shirt go with these pants?”
When did I forget how to dress myself? I keep waiting for her response to be, “Just sit on the bed, when I finish dressing Abbye, I’ll pick something out for you.”

“Of course I am listening to you, Honey; the TV just keeps rudely interrupting you.”
Any other guys have a problem with a TV that will not shut up while your wife is talking?

“You will never guess what your daughter did.”
It is amazing how she becomes the sole possession of my wife when she has done something unpleasant.

“I know it’s my turn, but, I’ll give you $1000 if you change this diaper”
Said the day after I introduced my daughter, Abbye to raisins.

“Does this smell weird to you?”
Whether is it laundry, food, milk, bodily functions or something else, I have learned that men and women appreciate odors in completely different ways.

“No, honey, I didn’t forget to rinse the milk out of this sippy cup; I am introducing Abbye to Cottage Cheese.”
When you have to use the garbage disposal on something that you just dislodged from a milk cup, there is a problem.

“I Love You”
I married up for sure. I am so blessed to have the Godliest woman I know as my wife. She is beautiful on the inside and out. I never want my love for her to be doubted by her or anyone else.

Guys – What are some things you say to your wife?

Ladies – What are some things you hear your husband say?

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5 Responses to “Abbye Did It” And Other Things I Say To My Wife

  1. Janice Myers says:

    Pretty funny!

  2. Tom Teel says:

    I have to ask about the picture of you two; is this copy one that someone found when cleaning up from the tornado? It looks pretty scratchy and worn; I’m just sayin’…

    • jtsooner24 says:

      No, it is not from the tornado debris. I just “Photoscaped” the pic a little to give it some character. Tried to find a way to make me look thinner, but no luck. 🙂

  3. I love this one, “It’s all part of the experience, Honey”

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